Purple Haze
by bratpackfilmfan
Summary: A complete destruction of everything M.I. High stood for, turning it into complete absurdity and madness mixed with the criminal, athlete, princess, basketcase and brain we all know and love. Blane gets hooked on marijuana and hotboxes the entire MI-9 joint constantly while Daisy catches the eye of a certain criminal.
1. The Intro

**DESCIPTION**

A complete destruction of everything M.I. High stood for, turning it into complete absurdity and madness mixed with the criminal, athlete, princess, basketcase and brain we all know and love. Blane gets hooked on marijuana and hotboxes the entire MI-9 joint constantly while Daisy catches the eye of one John Bender. However, the Grand Master has a new plan; a plan which would only affect Blane in the worst way possible, and get his true self to shine.

Characters (* means soon to appear in a later chapter):

Blane Whittaker

Daisy Millar

Rose Gupta

Lenny Bicknall

Stewart Critchley

Fifty Pence and company

Mr. Flatley

Mrs. Templeman

Frank London

Oscar Cole

Carrie Stewart

Avril Franklin

Keri Summers

The Grand Master*

That ice cream guy from 'Spy Animals'*

Chad Turner

John Bender

Allison Reynolds

Claire Standish

Andrew Clark

Brian Johnson

CHAPTER 1 THIS WAY...


	2. Urgent News

It is a new year at St. Hopes High. It is also a new year for Blane Whittaker, one of the three MI9 student spies. Their caretaker, Lenny, had recently rediscovered his old teenage hobby; dealing weed and crack cocaine in the East End of London. Eager, he gathered Blane, Rose and Daisy for a special MI9 meeting.

They shot down into the headquarters, going as far as to almost trip each other over because Lenny had told them it was extremely urgent. The three run over to Lenny, Daisy says; "What's going on? Is it bad?".

Lenny does a smug smirk and a grin like he loves himself. "Hm-m-m-m...well, for starters, I tricked all of you. Ha ha! I got something brilliant to show you.".

Daisy, visibly irritated: "Oh you fucking bastard."

Blane: "Why would you do that to us Lenny? You seem really different than yesterday!"

Lenny sarcastically belts out the lyrics of The Beatles' Yesterday, then slams a big briefcase on the table.

Blane: "What's that?"

Lenny smirks again: "Hah, you'll see."

With his smug ass grin, he opens the briefcase to reveal bags of cocaine, weed, crack, heroin, meth and other narcotics. All of their jaws dropped.

Rose: "Is that...Lenny, you can't be..."

Daisy: "That shit from that Snoop Dogg video is real?"

Blane: "Woah, is that...weed?"

Lenny: "I present to you my teenage years. When I was your age, I dealt drugs in the East End. Nah, my family life was fine, my mom was just all like, 'Don't you grow up to do drugs', so I rebelled against her rotten arse and did it to take the piss out of 'er."

Blane: "That bloody sod with the fur coat and the glasses was smoking that stuff in a locker once!"

Lenny: "He hotboxed himself in a school locker? Hah, the madlad!"

Rose: "Drugs are a really dangerous thing, you reali-"

Blane and Lenny turn around. "SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

Blane turns back. "Man, me buddies are always like pressuring me to try this shit, how much are you goin' for it?"

Lenny: "Hmmm...you're an exception. Show me your rollies."

Blane pulls out a packet of cigarette rollies. Lenny gives him an entire bag of weed in return.

Blane leaves, muttering "Fuck yeah bro." under his breath.

Daisy, in utter shock, just mopes away. Rose is stunned.

Rose: "What have you turned into? You were completely normal yest-"

Lenny: "Yeah, and you're completely ugly. Now get the fuck out and do some shitty mission."

Rose slowly walks away horrified.

Meanwhile in St. Hopes, a group of American exchange students have just gotten off the bus. Among them are a certain criminal, a certain basket case, a certain princess, a certain athlete, and a certain brain, all there as to purposely shoehorn a way to introduce them into this very story.

The criminal intimidates everything in his path, even the principal with his little glasses and innocent look. It wasn't like the arrogant, angry and jerkass principal he had at home...


	3. Enter Chad

Blane sat with his buddy, Stewart Critchley, in the school's courtyard. Stewart was harping on about Star Trek and how he wished he could've met Leonard Nimoy without him dying, but Blane was sick of his bullshit. Blane saw Daisy walk past with her friends, her long brown hair being enough to turn him on. Blane poked Stewart.

"Hey, take a look at Daisy over there, man. Per-fucking-fection.", Blane said.

Stewart: "Sorry man, I like Rose more."

Blane looked at him in disgust. "Rose? That geek?"

Stewart: "You know if she took those glasses off and let her hair hang down..."

Blane looked away, realizing that he probably subconsciously had a thing for her as she appeared down in the HQ.

Daisy was talking to her buddies, when all of a sudden, a curly haired dude walked past towards Blane and Stewart.

It was Chad Turner, the kid who Daisy fell for but it turned out he was a traitor who was working for SKUL. However, for whatever story-forcing reason, he severed ties with SKUL mere moments after returning from being caught out. He was a changed man.

"Hey.", Chad said.

Stewart spat out his 'drink'; a drink bottle secretly filled with Lemon Lime Bitters mixed with root beer mixed with dissolved cocaine mixed with LSD mixed with vodka, and exclaimed, "You again?".

Blane fell off the bench. "What in the fuck?", he yelled out loud. Everyone looked over, including Daisy, who was too shocked at the sight of Chad. Her two friends squealed and went teary eyed from seeing Chad again. Daisy, after finding out who he really was, **not so much.** She looked on with a cold expression on her face. Chad ignored her with a laughing 'pfft, bitch'.

"I severed ties with SKUL. I'm a changed man.", Chad said, with his fake ass American fused with British accent. Everyone gasps and starts speculating, 'What in the fuck is SKUL?'. Chad looks up. "You can all fuck off now.'.

He sits next to Blane and Stewart. Stewart turns around. "The fuck is SKUL?", he says.

"SKUL is a criminal organization that is attempting to take over the entire world and is the enemy of MI9 which is the faction that Blane right here works in as well as Rose over there, Daisy over there and that black janitor guy as the Zordon or whatever some shit equivalent running the HQ. Pretty deep stuff."

Blane becomes extremely nervous, shaking and cold at the fact that Chad just revealed all secret information that was meant to be classified to fucking oblivion was revealed right there and then in front of the entire school. Daisy and Rose, in different areas, heard Chad and had ominous chills running down their spines. Stewart however thinks it's absolute bullshit. "Alternate reality game eh? Can I join at some point?"

"Let's just forget it...", Blane nervously says. Stewart is oblivious and shrugs it off. "Anyway how's it been?", Chad asks. "...not bad, I suppose...", goes Blane, getting really sweaty and anxious.

Blane rips out a joint to try and derail the subject. "Look what I got here.", Blane says.

"A marijuana joint?" goes Stewart.

Blane: "Lenny gave me a whole bag of weed out back today, man. (Covering up the fact he was given the weed in the HQ)

Chad: "You want us to all smoke joints or something?"

Blane: "Yeah, maybe it'll bring us together or something..."

Chad: "Sorry man, I'm not gay."

Blane: "I didn't MEAN that I meant fucking friends!"

Chad: "Fine then, if it's weed I'm in."

 **Boy's toilets**

Blane, Stewart and Chad have hotboxed the entire boy's toilets as well as taken LSD which was also in Blane's bag of weed. Blane begins having extremely psychedelic fantasies of Daisy, including he and her playing around in a tangerine field with capsicum birds flying over pineapple towers akin to SpongeBob's house. In his trip, Daisy has become a drug on her own, giving him a high just by looking in her eyes, even imagining her saying, "Blane, I love you.". It leads to him deeming taking acid 'sniffing daisies'.

Stewart on acid was picturing an actual version of his joke movie 'The Good, The Chad and the Ugly' starring Blane. One scene has Blane yelling, "Take your fucking hands off Daisy, you dumb dirty yank!" to Chad as Daisy is tied to a chair in the background, kidnapped by Chad.

Chad however is reacting really violently to the LSD. He didn't take his correctly, leading to a bad trip. "MOM! MOM! MOM! HELP ME, SAVE ME!", he screamed and screeched. He was witnessing a culmination of scary demonic incel figures running close to him brandishing weapons, growling otherworldly, "SLAUGHTER THE CHAD!".

Blane was in bliss. His psychedelic fantasies were getting raunchier. Someone opens the door.

"Hey, give me my doobage.", a denim jacketed, fingerless gloved figure sinisterly said.


	4. The Criminal

Blane and his buddies stared at the fingerless gloved, denim jacketed figure, who deemed himself The Criminal. He had dark brown shaggy hair and flipped out a switchblade, a replaced one after his was stolen by a certain basket case.

"That's my weed you're smoking right there, dorks!", he exclaimed. The boys started to panic and ran outside. Fuming that Blane, Stewart and Chad took his weed, he pursues them, scaling pretty much all of Saint Hopes High to give them a taste of his medicine. Blane accidentally crashes into Mr. Flatley, the school's goofy glasses-donning principal, sending him slamming into the ground at a high enough velocity to put him in a coma for two weeks. He could've stopped to help, but no, if he did, The Criminal would have got him.

Stewart and Chad end up miles ahead of Blane. In one corridor, Fifty Pence, the wannabe rapper and school bully and his cronies were walking down it, flexing like they usually do. The pursue happened to continue down this hallway; Stewart and Chad topple and send Fifty Pence flying through the entire corridor and smashing into a brick wall at the end, they were running that fast. The Criminal was close to getting Blane; he threw a "Wet Floor" sign at Blane intentionally to get him down, but Blane dodged it, and it ended up smashing into Fifty Pence, lodging him even further into the wall and causing him further agony; the fire department had to be called in order to pry him out, and Fifty Pence became uncool, being worth as much as his nickname.

Blane finally catched up with the other two, but The Criminal was getting closer. Daisy and her friends were cheerleading in the court yard; not anymore. The pursuit wound up in everybody in the court yard being knocked in the air (accidentally), including Daisy and her friends. The Criminal was so furious that one boy reading the original 'Diary Of A Wimpy Kid' book found himself lodged in a basketball hoop. Blane, running the fastest, accidentally brushed Daisy a bit too hard on his way past; she rolled away at such a speed she fell out of school grounds, getting hit by a car and knocked even further through the air until she landed at the end of an intersection, shouting 'FUCK!' once she sat idle.

Finally, the Criminal catched up with Blane, taking him down and giving him a violent beatdown. "GIVE ME MY FUCKIN' WEED!", the Criminal yelled. Blane screamed and shoved the half-full bag in his face. "ALRIGHT YOU FUCKING WANKER! HAVE IT!", he screamed. Blane was as pale as a ghost. He'd never been in a full-blown physical confrontation; unfortunately it was one he was forced into. The Criminal got up. "Don't you ever take my weed!", he warned. "You're gonna get it the next time, man."

"Yeah, huh? You and what friends?", Blane asks. "Don't you talk about my friends. You don't know anything about my friends, you don't look at any of my friends, you don't speak to my friends, my fuckin' friends are in America!"

Blane is almost about to break down and cry, he couldn't handle this shit anymore. "Who are you?", he yells out.

"Why, I'm Johnny Bender. What's it to you?", he reveals.

"John Bender? The fuckin' geezer from the Breakfast Club right?"

"Yeah, now I gotta hit the road, dweeb."

Bender leaves.

Stewart and Chad get to Blane again.

"You just got toppled, man!", Stewart exclaims.

"Yeah, toppled over by John Bender from the Breakfast Club."

"Really? Some character from an 80s movie? What is this, a retarded fanfiction that shoehorns shit that the author likes for no apparent reason?", Chad asks.

Yes.

"Wanna go back inside?", Stewart asks. "Yeah..", Blane and Chad say, and they walk back in. Fifty Pence was still lodged in the wall as they walked past, with paramedics and emergency services hauling in the jaws of life to get him out. Mr. Flatley was hauled out. Daisy was staggering back through the door, her head, back and legs in immense pain. She looks at Blane with an ominous death glare. "That really hurt, Blane."

Blane attempts to apologize to her, but she scoffs and staggers away only to give out and be too taken away to relocate half of her bones. In the stretcher, the last thing she says to Zara, one of her friends and fellow cheerleaders; "Remember, it's still an A!", referencing the fact that Zara was saying the letter B instead of an A in the chant they were practicing.

Mrs. Templeman was so distressed by the chaotic events that she just got up and left. She couldn't handle it all; Fifty Pence lodged in a wall, Flatley knocked in a coma, multiple signage destroyed, multiple kids becoming human aircraft, and Daisy becoming debilitated from being almost completely destroyed. It was so bad that class was called off and school was done for the day.

Lenny ordered Blane and the now wheelchair-ridden Daisy to the HQ. On the way down the loft, Daisy in her wheelchair crashed down. By the time the elevator door opened in entrance to the HQ, Blane and Daisy were tangled in a mess of bent wheelchair. Lenny just did another 'pfft' laugh. He had forced Rose to research drugs and was forced to watch propaganda that enticed the viewer into taking drugs.

Talking to the mangled Blane/Daisy mess, Lenny opened up with: "Rose over here has now shown solidarity with my drug dealing cause. I've invited you down as she is going to try her first hit of coke!".

Daisy's head slowly rose. "What?", she weakly groaned.

Lenny: "Take it away Rose."

In a robotic, scared-at-gunpoint-type voice, Rose said, "I used to dislike drugs, but now I know I was the most uncool, retarded scumbag on Earth, so I will now try my first hit of coke."

Rose took a bag of cocaine, frantically putting it in lines as Lenny egged her on, and she sniffed the entire thing. She dropped to the ground. It was too potent, spiraling her into a vegetative state. Lenny did another 'pfft' smirk. "Stupid bitch...haha."

Blane and Daisy untangled themselves and Daisy screamed. "WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?", she exclaimed.

"Because she was an easy target, sweets.", Lenny smugly said.

It only got worse. Lenny did another bag of cocaine himself and became erratic, shaking shit around and generally being a crazy guy with no inhibitions. He began mood swinging heavily, going from singing 'Happy Meal' in falsetto to screaming curse words and punching the computer screens. Blane and Daisy (rightfully) got the fuck out of there before they became fused with the computer screens.

Outside the janitor's closet, the two discovered that there was a weird black clothed girl with a stove pouring Cap'n Crunch, Pixie Stix, soggy chips, bread and ketchup into a pot and stirring it and eating it. Daisy asked, 'What the fuck are you doing?'

The figure turned around and said, 'You never know when you have to jam.'

They ignored it and just walked past. Stewart and Chad were being mindlessly teased by Bender. "Hi, custard hair!" Bender said sarcastically to Stewart. He catches eye of Blane and Daisy. "Oh, it's you again huh?"

"Get outta here." Blane said.

Bender catches Daisy in his eyes and walks over to her.

"Well hello, ma belle.", Bender sleazily, but at the same time bullying, says.

Daisy begins looking grossed out.

"What's your name?"

"Daisy."

"Daisy?"

"Yes, it's my name."

"No, it's what you wish you were."

Daisy: "Fuck off."

She beats past him with Blane and they and the other two boys take off.

Bender smiles to himself. "Hmm, dealing with a British Claire, huh?"


	5. The Adventures Of Lenny

In the HQ, Rose was completely incapacitated by the effects of the cocaine she was forced to snort, just a vegetable on the ground. Lenny was snorting full bags left and right and smashing his head on the concrete walls. A message came on the only functioning screen left, from Frank London, a fellow agent at MI9, advising Lenny that an urgent meeting needed to occur, regarding some instability and reported sexism within the hierarchy in the agency, and how to tackle the problem.

Lenny decides to attend this meeting on heavy doses of cocaine. He leaves Rose, who was just beginning to twitch and move slightly. She regains consciousness, and lays there, beginning to realize that she, a generally anti-drug and respectful high school student, was made to snort lines of cocaine at Lenny's expense. He'd gone rogue. 'He was just fine the other day!', her mind exclaims.

Meanwhile at the MI9 offices, Frank is standing near a whiteboard, with a long table of agents, including some of the younger spies, like Oscar Cole, Carrie Stewart, Avril Franklin, and Keri Summers, from the adjacent Saint Hearts school. The meeting was called after reports surfaced of alleged sexism and gender discrimination within the workplace. The meeting itself was quite serious. Keri testified that she was pushed by an older male agent who called her a 'slut', for no reason.

The meeting looked like it was getting somewhere, with the appropriate actions being taken. Frank settled on firing the discriminators and giving Keri, Avril and Carrie (the latter which testified racism AND sexism) massive settlements. A horrible situation was seeing a silver lining...until Lenny entered the room.

Lenny was wearing only boxer shorts, and was fidgeting with everything with a manical laugh and grin on his face. "Did somebody call, heheh, the LENNY, huh?", he cackled. Frank looked horrified, and so did everyone in attendance of the meeting. Lenny then sat down on one of the officer's laps, crushing the poor guy.

Frank continued speaking. "Uh...well...I will arrange for you girls to receive a..."

Frank looked at Lenny, who was rustling everybody's papers randomly including Keri's descriptions of her events. Keri quickly snatched her papers away but they were caught in Lenny's teeth which then tore the papers.

"...a settlement...", Frank nervously continued.

Lenny then started to take everyone's cups of waters and douse them on their heads. "Ah! What the hell was that for?", Keri screeched. One by one, he doused everyone with their own water while manically giggling. He then raided the cabinets and found some lighter fluid, dousing himself with it and lighting a match to himself. He then paraded himself around the table while the flames were raging off of him, still giggling. "IT DOESN'T EVEN HURT! HEHEHEHEHEHEEEE!", he yelled.

He burst through the door still in flames, and escaped the HQ, running outside the window in circles. A bystander acted quick and turned a fire hose on him.

"...meeting adjourned.", Frank quickly said, and ran the fuck away from the place as far as he could.

Meanwhile back at Saint Hopes, Blane and Daisy decide to return to the HQ to check back on Rose. They'd walked past Fifty Pence, who was being hung upside down while being beat like a pinata by the people he bullied in the ways he bullied them, even Daisy who threw a snowball at his head in revenge for that time when The Big Freeze occured.

They make it down to the HQ, and Rose is laying there, dumbfounded. "But why?", she exclaimed.

Daisy ran to her. "Oh my god Rose, are you okay?"

"I don't even know anymore, Daisy...I don't even know...why did it happen? Why? Why is Lenny acting so scary and erratic?"

"That's why I'd never take even a grain of whatever he's on.", Daisy replies with.

"Man, what are you birds talkin' about? Lenny's fuckin' cool for taking drugs! I've always wanted to smoke a blunt, like all those blokes at Woodstock, or fuckin Scoop Doggy!"

"Are you mentally retarded, Blane? Drugs are dangerous!" Daisy yells.

"Don't listen to that crap, they're all adults, it's what they do!" Blane counters with.

"You're gonna be dead in a ditch if you go by that statement, you know?" Daisy says, looking like she's about to cry; she didn't want Blane to die, she loved him too much. Unfortunately, like Lenny, in this fanfiction, his character seems to be bastardized to shit.

"Pfft, go fuck yaself.", Blane says, walking out of the place.

Daisy breaks down and cries when he leaves. It was pretty much similar to when Chad was leaving. "BUT I LOVED HIM! HE WAS REALLY THE ONLY BOY THAT EVER UNDERSTOOD ME! IT'S NOT FAIR!"

Blane walked out of the janitor's closet, while Stewart and Chad were kicking Fifty Pence's head, their slight 'pfft' kicks turning into extreme velocity kicks with the most extreme hateness racing through their minds. Lenny went yodeling as he slapped Fifty Pence's now cold face, ripped off the dude's jacket and paraded around with it on his head. 'YODELEHEEEHOOOOOOOOOO!', he yelled racing down the hallway, his voice becoming more reverberated as it shook with every footstep.

Stewart and Chad are finished kicking. Fifty Pence was no more. Stewart walked up to Blane and said, "No more snowballs at Daisy's head I guess.". Blane did a 'Well alright' shrug and walked with the other two. Mr. Flatley was reported to have awoken from his coma only two days after he was declared to have spiraled into one and was slated to return to work in half a week.

The school halls and classrooms were empty now; school had pretty much ended. However, one of the rooms contained the American exchange students. Blane took a peek inside, and noticed that Bender, that weird chick cooking the Pixie Stix, some athlete guy, a nerdy, innocent kid, and a redhead chick were sitting in the seats, looking bored.

"No...waaa?" Blane dumbfoundedly says. "Is that...the entire Breakfast Club? Is that why that chick was cooking Pixie Stix? No way."

Stewart, who had watched the Breakfast Club multiple times, went pale upon peeking through the window. It was John Bender sitting in there. It was Andrew Clark sitting in there. It was Brian Johnson sitting in there. It was Allison Reynolds sitting in there. It was Claire Standish sitting in there. Bender rolled his sleeves to mock Andy pretending he is a macho man, and a cigar burn was on his arm, giving away the fact it was Bender.

Stewart looks to Blane and Chad. "Ffff...fffuck."


	6. Bender Sniffs A Daisy

Daisy is completely torn apart by Blane's attitude towards her. She is crying uncontrollably, her sobs being some of the most ferocious a human being could sob. "WHY? WHY?", she screeches. Rose is trying to console her, but Daisy was just getting worse. Daisy ends up crying for eight hours straight. By the time the two were okay enough to leave the HQ, it was night-time. Blane, Chad and Stewart were in the courtyard, smoking joints and watching Shrek ironically, in it's pixelated GBA Video quality, on Stewart's Game Boy Advance. The two girls watch the boys out the window in the dark.

"Look at Blane, he's not the guy I thought he'd be. I loved him so much, I definitely fancied him. Turns out he's an arsehole."

"You'll find someone at some point, Daisy."

The three boys see Daisy and Rose in the window and all stick their middle fingers up simultaneously, stoned and thinking it was Fifty Pence and his buddies resurrected. Blane would have done it anyway if he knew that was those two.

Daisy starts to choke up and cry again.

She stops crying once she hears distantly; "I WANNA BE AN AIRBORNE RANGER! I WANNA LEAD A LIFE OF DANGER!"

"Where is that coming from?", she asks.

The noise gets louder. Suddenly, Bender comes running down the hallway, only to stop when he sees Daisy. "Oh, look who it is!", he says teasingly.

"Leave me alone, Bent Sexual Orientation."

"Hey, I'm just tryna help ya!" he says sarcastically with his hands up.

Daisy was almost about to beat him to a bloody pulp, until she realized, Blane was being an asshole to her. She could get with Bender just to spite him and get revenge on him. Daisy quickly changes gears and begins to smile. "Hmm, Johnny?", she says in a breathy, sexual sounding voice. "Forget about what I said! You're quite handsome!"

Bender trying to look cool flippantly says, "Sorry, I got Claire, it's just that, you looked like you needed some help."

Daisy has never seen the Breakfast Club. She saw two seconds of the movie (where Allison was eating the sandwich) one time when Stewart was watching it and she called it 'melodramatic rubbish', and only knew Bender by name just there in then. "Bloody hell is Claire?", she asked.

"...some chick that I hang around with."

He looks to Rose. "What are you lookin' at, dork?", he asks.

"Daisy's one of my friends..."

Daisy, trying to get into Bender's good books, suddenly out of nowhere dismisses Rose and walks off with Bender. "Nice try, Rose, you're lying. Pfft.", she says, obviously put on.

The two walk off. Blane and his buddies were giggling at Shrek while thick weed smoke filled the air.

"Hey guys, got a good idea eh? Follow me.", Blane said.

The boys follow Blane to the janitor's closet, where puts in his finger print and yanks the other boys in before the door closes. Chad is familiar as he was in the HQ that one time. Stewart...not so much.

However, unauthorized entry was detected with Stewart, and Chad was blacklisted. MI9 recently installed a system where anybody who gains unauthorized access to the janitor's closet has the loft fail on them and they fall straight down to the elevator at high velocity with no safety, knocking out or killing them, and agents drag their body to an interrogation room. As a result, the three boys slam face first down the elevator. They're bruised to shit, but Stewart didn't care; his Game Boy was obliterated.

"Ah! Agh! Holy fuck! Holy fuck! Holy fuck! My Game...Boy...GAME BOY! ARGH! No!", he screamed.

"Fuck, now what are we gonna do?", Chad asked.

"Ha, I know."

Blane walks over to the demolished desk and dials on the half broken phone line to Lenny, who was streaking a football game at St. Hopes Football Stadium while getting stoned and pebbled by the booing crowds and security guards chasing him about. Lenny was rolling around in the stadium, farting out the 6000 calories of Taco Bell he consumed in another coke rush in the restaurant. He was eventually caught, and his phone got confiscated from him on the suspicion that multiple search queries for "how to make cocaine" were visible on the screen as he was running around holding it.

Blane gives up after trying to ring Lenny about seventy times, increasingly fidgety. "We still have a bit of grass left at least.", Blane nervously said. The boys hotboxed the entire HQ with what weed they had left. All of a sudden, Lenny comes running in wearing rags, holding bags of cocaine, giggling like a little girl and bouncing around. After breathing in some of the weed, Lenny collapsed. The MI9 HQ became smoked out completely. Scoop Doggy's bedroom didn't compare to this, Fifty Pence's bedroom didn't compare to this. All that was heard in the HQ was cough after cough, wheeze after wheeze, until all three of them fell asleep.

Shit would prepare itself to make contact with a fan, however.

The Grand Master watches his secret little camera of the boys hotboxing the HQ. Petting his fat ass rabbit, he begins to develop a plan which would threaten the stability of...Blane, Lenny, Stewart, and Chad's minds. To steal all of the drugs in the world and create his own crack empire that Pablo Escobar would bow down and cry at."Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm...going after Daisy or Rose? They don't even give a rat's buttocks, it's no use antagonizing them. I'd get a better reaction out of these wannabe druglords. Hahahahahaha."


	7. Computer Class

Blane and Stewart walk to their lockers once the school bell rings. "Wadda we have?", Blane asks. "Computer class!", Stewart excitedly said. Chad got done by the police for smelling like weed (he forgot to wash his clothes afterwards), and Chad was forced into promising he wouldn't throw the others under the bus. So he lay in the police station disgruntled.

The boys walk into the computer room. Blane sees Daisy in there, alone; there were only a few seats left. Scoop Doggy took one of the other seats since his buddies were there. The only seats left were two...all next to Daisy. Blane holds back, but Stewart walks anyway, and sits in the second seat, the one vacant seat being directly next to Daisy, and the only one left out of the entire room. Blane was scared to even go near Daisy after how he crushed her dreams back at the HQ. Since it went down in the HQ, they couldn't bring it up at all. They couldn't just lie about where the drama started.

Daisy however, didn't give a single fuck. "Go away.", she said, as Blane nervous and shaking takes the seat next to Daisy. "Daisy...come-", he said before being interrupted by a louder "Go away!". Blane was pale. Part of him wanted to apologize for his retarded comments, part of him wanted to argue why he stood by said comments.

Mrs. Templeman comes in. "Hello class, today we're going to be practicing how to um...Python...writing...code...what is that back there?"

Scoop Doggy was playing porn out loud on his computer and jacking off openly while his buddies egged him on. The other class members looked over, and instantly looked back in disgust. "SWEDISH PORN'S THE FUCKIN BEST!", he yelled. "Oh my god...Ew...get out of here and go wash your hands, mister!", she exclaimed.

Scoop walks out sniggering and laughing with his fly completely open while his buddies just randomly get up and follow him, even though they weren't told to leave either. Mrs. Templeman just looks in complete and utter distress. Daisy looks back to Blane. "For the last time, Blane, go away! You made it very clear that you want to take drugs and die because you think it's cool, being blind from people telling you it isn't a good idea...including your own FRIENDS."

Daisy dropped a bombshell; she outright pretty much stated that she thought they were friends. Blane looks on in guilt. "Daisy, I'm-"

Daisy punches him in the face and makes him fall off the chair onto the ground. "GO AWAY!", she screams. She picks up her stuff and leaves the room. "Ooooooh!" everybody goes. "She ANGRAYY!" some dude at the back yells. Blane is dazed on the ground, Stewart helps him back up. "Pfft, Don't worry about it, she's a high school girl, they all overreact to drama!". Blane shrugs it off and sits back down.

Mrs. Templeman collapses her head, unable to handle the pressure. First the chasing incident, Fifty Pence being beat to death, Scoop Doggy jacking off to porn in her own computer class, and now Daisy punching Blane in the face. She slumps into a nervous breakdown on the desk, acting crazy and erratic. Lenny comes bursting in the door in a chicken suit and flapping it's arms around, mimicking Templeman's breakdown. Where Templeman would sob extremely viciously, Lenny would mockingly scream the same sobbing back in her face, and back to giggling.

Blane and Stewart just sit there with their jaws dropped. "What...the...fuck...man...", Stewart stutters.

Lenny bounces out the door and cock-a-doodle-doos (like a rooster) down the hallway. On his way down, he accidentally gets tripped over by Daisy, whose sitting in the hallway sobbing heavily. Lenny stops giggling and mood swings. "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR YOU BLOODY BITCH? WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR! WHY WOULD YOU FUCKING TRIP ME?". Daisy sobs heavier. "I'M SOHOHOHOHOHORYYYY!" Lenny mocks this sobbing. "WAAAAH! WAAAAH! WAAAAAH! WAAAAH! WAAAAAH!". In his chicken suit, he then walks away and suddenly viciously punches the fire alarm.

The sprinklers go off, and Daisy begins to scream, "I WANNA DI-HI-HI-HIEEEEEEEEEE! AUGH-HAH-HAAAAAAAAH!"

Templeman just leaves the classroom and the school entirely. All of the sprinklers around the school were going off, even in the computer room. Rose is electrocuted and is knocked out for the second time in a row, while Stewart grabs a new invention of his; a resizeable umbrella. The idea of this umbrella was that it would size itself to the entire width of the room to cover the entire room. He invented it a few days before, and was lucky to have brought it with him.

Unfortunately, the umbrella stabbed itself through the top of the walls and the water pipes, and water began exploding into the classroom at full, brute force and it was beginning to flood, made even worse by the airtight door. Stewart just scrambled, with Blane following suit. Not thinking, Stewart locks the door, locking the class in the room with an airtight door that has begun to flood significantly high.

Mr. Flatley was a day off from returning to work. If he had seen this, he'd have spiraled back into a fucking coma. The class is half full of water; floating textbooks, pens, and expensive pencil cases, as the other kids were trying to escape. "How do we get out?", a panicking girl says. "Don't worry, I know!", a cheery girl responds. It was Avril Franklin, the perky goth. She swam as fast as she could to the window and smashed herself into it, breaking through and sending a waterfall down.

Down with her, came Rose, still unconscious, a bunch of computers, and Ms. Templeman's desk. The kids left run up to the window and try and yell to Avril; "Oh my god! You saved us!". She was completely limp and not moving. Rose woke up and began staggering. She jabbed Avril trying to wake her up, but realized her face was cold and stood back and ran for help.

"Holy fucking shit.", one kid said in the destroyed class.

Meanwhile, Daisy was slipping and sliding across the wet floor in the hallways trying to get away from Blane. Blane was trying to pursue her, but she wasn't having it. In a panic, she began intentionally chucking herself violently onto the floor and sliding as fast as she could away from him. The sprinklers were going at full force, giving the hallways a foggy feeling. To Blane, Daisy just slid away into the fog, until he heard a BANG.

Daisy smashed into a pile of trash cans. She lay there, bracing herself over Blane coming to her. "Daisy! Daisy! Come on, I'm sorry! I was just being stupid!"

She got up. "You chased me, in all this wet, going this far, for me?"

 _ **To be continued. If you like or hate it so far, please review it! Thanks.**_


	8. The Aftermath

"Come on, Daisy, I'm sorry! I just...weed's the only purpose in life..."

Daisy ends the conversation there and slips and slides away as far as gravity could take her. Blane walks off in anger.

Scoop Doggy and his entourage left the school grounds and walked up the road; until a van came into view and started slinking beside them. It was Fifty Pence's buddies, who were convinced it was Scoop that devised the plan to kill him and made Stewart and Chad do the deed to prevent the blame from being put on him. Around the same time Fiddy was killed, he was having a rivalry with Scoop, and the two entourages would clash constantly.

"Oi! Oi! We're not bloody stupid ya know!", one of Fiddy's acquaintances called out from the van. "Whadya mean?", Scoop turns back and says. "You were the one that took out Fiddy, weren't ya!"

Scoop walks up to the van. "Are you on drugs, man? I didn't do shit! That was fockin' Stewart!"

"Pfft, fuckin using Stewart Critchley to cover up your bloody bullshit? We ain't fucked in the head, blud, ya know, you're about to pay!"

The boys in the van get out pistols and begin shooting at Scoop and his entourage who leg it. Scoop made it, but one of his buddies was shot in the leg, leading to a painful hospital trip and the embarrassment of his mom coming in to pay the hospital bill. Also in the hospital was Avril, who after chucking herself through the glass and impacting on the courtyard to save the classroom from flooding, was pretty much about to kick the bucket, which she did about two hours later.

The next day would be possibly the darkest post-tragedy day at St. Hopes High School. Mr. Flatley would come back to; a water-damaged classroom with a broken window, two dead students, broken water-pipes, and a non-functioning fire alarm. However, he knew none of this as he ascended the steps of the school. The hallways were starting to get moldy from the water. The last time this happened, the school became almost quarantined, when a bunch of Sex Pistols fans smashed up the hallways and the classrooms in December 1976.

The solemn atmosphere is further amplified by an 'important assembly' as announced over the PA speakers. The entirety of St. Hopes High gathers in the auditorium to pay tribute to Fifty Pence and Avril. Mr. Flatley, shaken and nervous, walks up to the microphone.

"Morning, students...I've just learned that we've lost...two students on top of the damage done to the school. You might already have been aware of this, but sadly, we've lost: Mr. Julian Hamley, the charismatic aspiring rapper and...bully you might say, that called himself Fifty Pence. Alongside him, we've lost Mrs. Avril Franklin, whom despite her...gothic...style, was a cheery, lovely, pleasant girl. We're gathered here today to celebrate the lives of these two children. The school's infrastructure might be severely damaged, but the thing is...that can be replaced. Two young lives cannot."

Flatley leaves the stage, unsure of himself about anything. Most of the kids in the audience were crying. Blane and Stewart just sat there, with cold expressions on their faces. They weren't the type to process deaths that easily. It would take a while for them to show an ounce of emotion towards Fiddy or Avril. The guy next to them, not so much. The guy was a wreck, he was crying harder than anybody else.

The girl next to him was comforting him. "I'm so sorry, Oscar. I didn't know how much you loved her."

"I loved her to death, Carrie! I fuckin' loved her!", Oscar yelled, increasingly loud. He began sobbing violently and ran out of the auditorium. Daisy, sitting with her friends, was beginning to process the fact. In primary school, Daisy had been paired up with Avril in one of those 'buddies' programs that pair up older students with younger students to guide them.

Speeches by other school figures followed, and then led to the student eulogies. Each student had to get up on stage and share a memory of the two. Blane's voice wavered sharing his, Stewart cut himself off and walked off the stage after completely realizing, Daisy came on the stage afterwards.

"With Julian, Fifty Pence, as you would call him, I had some not good memories, he threw a snowball at my head that time when it was really freezing, and he and a few certain people got my arm broken by not catching me in drama class. But, really, deep down inside, I still feel really sad about what happened to him, and I hope that he's resting in peace. Now...Avril...hits a bit closer to home. In primary school, me and her were paired up, she was a few years younger than me, it was one of those junior/senior things where you'd help the new kids make friends. We'd often hang together and we shared a bond over many things, we would talk about the latest music, fashion, we'd even talk about some older stuff, and I'll always remember this one time when we were in the playground and she just looked to me and said, 'You're a sister to me.'" As soon as she said that quote, her voice shook, and she exploded into a mess of grief.

Blane wanted to reconcile with her but he felt that she'd see it as exploiting a tragedy. However, he gave her a nice little hug. On stage. To the shock of the school. To her, she'd forgiven Blane in the picosecond following the moment his arms wrapped around her. "Sorry about what I did, really."

School was out after the assembly. The circumstances were just too grim for school to continue on. The crime scene was still half cleaned up; they had to call in Neal Smither from Crime Scene Cleaners Inc. in America. They realized they made the wrong choice when Neal began shit-talking Avril and Fifty, calling Avril 'a stupid fuckin' dirtbag' for jumping out the window and Fifty's murder as 'one less asshole in the world', and laughing off at the parts of Fifty that were left in the school hallways.

The Grand Master, watching with his little secret camera, becomes fed up. "No! Blane's becoming distracted!"


	9. Coping With Loss

**I thank my first follower of this story for doing so.**

Blane walks back to his house with Stewart. They'd just walked out of one of the most saddening memorials the school ever had. In their first year there, five students were killed when their excursion bus rolled over due to a fight breaking out between two of them. It reminded them of that day, where the school was similarly quiet and depressing, except the two knew Avril and Fifty, it hit closer to home and stung them more, especially Avril, who Blane had some sort of feelings for. Oscar, however, was completely wrecked, destroyed, his purpose in life was out the window.

Oscar was rolling around the footpath in a fetal position, completely distressed. He tried hiding the fact he liked Avril a lot. To everyone else, these feelings came out of nowhere. Blane and Stewart happened to walk past the distraught disaster that was Oscar. "Man, you alright?', Blane asks. Oscar doesn't even talk, he's wrecked. All he could spit out was "AVRIIILLLL!" at the top of his lungs. "I LOOOOVED HER!". He was having flashbacks; "Stop being a baby! I'm trying to help you Oscar! You can't go through school with a lack of confidence!"

"You're hiding something."

"WHY WON'T YOU LET ME IN?"

"Oscar stop running away from me! I know you wanna be my friend!"

The words were just echoing in Oscar's ear. He felt like an asshole for running away from her. He felt like an asshole for not saying he was a spy. He felt like an asshole all around. He was a waterfall.

The two bewildered boys just walk off. They go to Blane's house to try and escape the feelings creeping over them. Avril's death stung them hard and they didn't exactly hang around a lot. "Whatcha wanna do?", Blane said. "Watch TV prob'ly.", Stewart answered.

The two sit on the floor and Blane hits the remote, only to be greeted by a newscaster with grainy photos of Avril and Fifty on screen. "Tributes are flowing in for the death of two St. Hopes students. 16 year old Avril Franklin reportedly leaped out of a window to save a classroom from flooding and died on impact, and Julian Hamley's cause of death is under investigation, police saying it may be a murder."

The two boys facepalm. "This is gonna haunt us, man."

"It's gonna haunt me! I was the one with the umbrella that smashed the pipes in! She probably wouldn't have died if I didn't do that!"

"Think of it this way, if you didn't do that, her death would have happened a bit later! Easy as that!" Blane callously said.

Blane was just coping with the fact that he loved Avril just as much as Daisy and deep inside he was crying like a baby.

"In other news, St. Hopes janitor Lenny Bicknall was arrested at the St. Hopes Burger King for disorderly conduct, disrupting the peace, and cocaine possession. His arrest comes after a teenage boy in rap attire who calls himself 'Scoop Doggy' stormed the same restaurant and placed an order, uttering extreme obscenities and provoking a physical confrontation with the manager."

Blane's entire demeanor sank. With no Lenny, how the fuck was M.I. High going to be led by?

At the M.I.9. office, the agency is stuck on who to choose; Horatio Stark or Frank London. Stark's hatred of the M.I. High spies was becoming more intense and unhealthy; at the election, Stark began discussing plans to assassinate Blane, Rose, Daisy, Dan, Tom, Zoe, Aneisha, Keri, Oscar and Carrie and disband the entirety of M.I. High in order to make room for more 'adult' matters, and started praising god that Avril was already dead. "ONE LESS STUPID TEENAGE SPY IN THE WORLD! HA HA HA!"

After he became vocal about it, he was forcibly removed from the office and given a dishonorable discharge. Frank won by a landslide. Avril's death was an issue that needed to be tackled under Frank. Avril had become a spy herself in order to save Oscar, Carrie and Rose once, but her memories were erased; nonetheless liking her skills, she was given more of that green icecream Smarty stuff to get her back into spying action. She was there when Lenny destroyed the important sexual harassment meeting with his crazy cocaine doings.

Avril had to be replaced. Frank began scanning for new individuals, and focused on one of Daisy's friends, Zara, as a candidate. Another target, a male, was Stewart. However, Zara was extremely ditsy. Therefore, she would be unfit and incompatible with MI9. Stewart knew A LOT. Frank focused on him a lot more; until he saw that Stewart was wearing a Ramones T-shirt. "Nope, fuck him, bet he doesn't know what they are."

Eventually, Frank went 'fuck it'.

Blane and Stewart eventually just brought out a baggie in Stewart's own house and smoked the lot of it. They were not coping with the loss of Avril at all. They were finding it hard to erase her face out of their mind. She was haunting their thoughts. Now they knew how Oscar felt. He had ran out to the courtyard to find her dead, being showered by the waterfall that was the classroom she jumped out of, just to save everyone else. He felt like Mr. Adler from South Park. He never got to say goodbye.

Avril may have been a bit of a goody two shoes, but most boys around her found her quite the attractive girl really. So did Scoop, who was completely unaware of anything because he was at Burger Kings across the UK ruining everyone's restaurant experience with his entourage. As he did this, he embraced the false accusation that he killed Fifty Pence and began taking credit, completely careless about the fact he could be potentially arrested as a result.

As Blane leaves Stewart's house after a eight-tour toking session, his communicator goes off.

"Every M.I. High spy come here, now."


	10. Unexpected Return

A body is hauled into the M.I.9's medical operating theatre.

"I was just glad we were able to be given the body, if we administer this chemical into her body right now, we have a chance of bringing her back to life, she is part of team B and we need her in the event of an emergency!", the hazmat suited man says to his fellow hazmat suited colleague. "This better work, London!"

"It will! The only problem is explaining how she's alive again when she was clearly dead!"

"We gotta do something about that if this works, Frank."

The two men position the body, and rip open the bag, to reveal Avril's body, which had cuts and scratches, and one of her arms was broken. Decomposition was surprisingly not there, so it had to be done fast. "Alright, do it."

One of the men jabbed a syringe full of green liquid into her, squeezing the entire substance in. "It usually takes 30 minutes for the deceased in question to begin moving, connect the ECG to her, Stark!"

The two men were Frank London and Horatio Stark.

Stark hooks up the ECG to her, and the two wait for ten minutes, until color begins appearing in her face five minutes in, and five minutes later, she begins to twitch. The twitching turns into moving, and the moving turns into speaking. "...what's...going on?" she begins to mutter.

"Looks like she's back." Frank tells Stark. Frank looks to her. "Hello Avril. You're alive."

"I feel so cold, I can't move, it's like someone tied a rubber band around me and cut off all my circulation..." she whispers and mutters.

"You'll take a while to get back into gear. You jumped out of the school window trying to save the school from flooding."

"I remember going to do that..."

"You were dead for a day or two until we realized there was an antidote for death in the works. We were almost about to make arrangements that would have replaced you."

Avril begins to turn her head, twist her hands around and stretch to try and make herself move. She feels herself becoming more aware and stronger, until she stands up. "I had a near death experience!" she suddenly exclaims. "I would say it was a death experience based on the fact that you were declared dead."

Avril, in disbelief begins to walk, aided by the two guys. She left the M.I.9 building and immediately went to St. Hopes. School was in session, and the class was to build a memorial for her. The class adjacent was tasked with doing the same for Fifty. Avril looks on as Oscar, face scrunched up, writes a message on the memorial. The memorial was decked with many photos of her. Davina Berry, sobbing, looks at a photo of her and Avril together.

Avril begins to cry herself. "Oh...Oscar...he does care for me." She slumps on the ground and begins to sob. Scoop comes marching in the hallway by himself, until he sees Avril. "W-w-w-oah..." he exclaims, stepping back a bit. "Wait a minute, they was saying you died just then!" Avril, unable to explain how she was brought back to life or the fact she was brought back at all, stutters. "I was dead! I remember, I swam to the window, the class was flooding, my gothic makeup was starting to come off, hair was all over my face, I swam to the window, and I bashed out of it, the last thing I saw was the hopscotch! It was so warm after that, I felt so relaxed, I was so peaceful, it felt like I went down into this pleasant waterfall. Then I woke up, I felt cold, I couldn't move, it was like somebody put a rubber band around me and cut off all my circulation. It was in this white room, with two hazmat suited men, one of them sounded like Frank! Now I'm here, breathing and alive, wondering what just happened!"

Scoop is confused. "So you sayin' that you were aware you died?"

"Pretty sure I was, you'd understand if you'd had a near-death experience too!"

"Well 'dey're makin' a shrine of ya in there and 'dey're all cryin' their heads off, how are you gonna explain this to them?"

"I will tell them. And I'm going to do it right now!" she says. She marches to the door and yanks it wide open.

Everybody falls silent. Mrs. King drops her hot tea on the ground, not flinching a bit. Avril looks on at the class. Her face scrunches up and she bursts into tears again, as Davina shouts, "Oh my god, Avril's back! She's alive!"

"Avril? Is that you?" King asks.

"YES! It's me...I'm pretty sure...*sob*...that I died and came back!"

The class begins to shout and cheer. Oscar shoves himself past chairs and tables and grabs Avril tight in his arms. "Oh my god! You're alive! I missed you! I thought you were gone for good!" The two embrace and sob heavily as the class cheers. Donovan Butler scribbles "WELCOME BACK" on a piece of paper and slaps it onto her 'memorial'. Coincidentally, a figure burst into the adjacent class.

It was Fifty Pence. "Cunts, I am not dead!" he announces. Apparently, Frank and Stark put him back to life too to make it fair. His homies latch onto him. Avril's return was more celebrated, however. Scoop stands at the door, wiping away a tear himself. He had feelings too. Mrs. King immediately phones Mr and Mrs. Franklin. "Um, you aren't going to believe this! I'm pretty sure Avril is standing in our classroom alive!"

Not too long later, Avril's parents come in. "Mum! Dad!" she exclaims, her face now red. Her parents saw Avril's DarkMinister tattoo on her arm. "That's our baby! Oh my god it's her!". It was a miracle. The class was in a euphoria that would last for weeks on end. It would take a while for everything to go back to normal.

Meanwhile, the Grand Master stepped outside of his shitty SKUL office for the first time in years, and infiltrated 10 Downing Street, shooting the Prime Minister with a positron beam that would make him ban all weed. "Ha ha, Blane will love being behind bars." he sinisterly mutters.


End file.
